Aurelius (he of snorting fame) used to refer to Liturgy as dance. Nothing should interfere with the Liturgical Dance, he held. Effort must be taken to minimize unnecessary movement. For several years after I left, I strove to encourage this attitude in the church I attend. Finally, I came to realize that we are not a liturgical community. So what if our liturgical dance resembles more a free-for-all than a finely choreographed music hall piece!
Liturgy isn’t all that’s a dance.
Prayer this morning was going along quite nicely, thank you, until I uttered a phrase that made me stop and think.
“I don’t want to dance anymore.”
What the hell did that mean, I wondered. Which dance was I tired of?
It’s the dance that I do with the Spirit. It’s my entire relationship with that Divine Other that has come to be embodied by dance. The movements are finely choreographed. Some cosmic Choreographer has set before me a set of pre-determined steps the flow of which leads inexorably to… Well, that’s the problem, what does it lead to.
Ever been to a gay bar, recently? Or watched scenes from Queer as Folk? You know the dance there? Those dances, too, are finely choreographed… though never taught. The rhythm of the music itself teaches the participants the steps; the bodies flow and undulate to the mystic, primal beat.
That music, that dance, as often as not is foreplay. It heats the blood, drives the heart, exercises that part of our mind responsible for the flow of testosterone… I digress.
The spiritual dance of my spirit with The Spirit is like that… It flows to the mysterious beat of the love song sung by that Divine Other. And I want out. Out of the dance.
I want into the bed. I’m tired of the foreplay, I want to immerse myself in that beat, feel the spiritual blood surge against me, hear the pounding of the Other Heart. I want to engage fully in the undulating, primal surge of Spirit love.
“No,” my Partner whispers. “You don’t get it.”
And it dawns on me.
The dance… It IS the bed.
The dance… It ISN’T foreplay.
The dance… It IS the flow of the love song sung since the dawn of time, coursing through my veins, drawing me to that center place. That Center Place. It’s the beat, that spiritual blood surging, the Other Heart pounding against me. That Other Love entering me, taking me, possessing me… filling me.
The Dance is Life.
The Dance is Unity with Other.
Now is.
Then can’t be until I see it, feel it, sense it, know it as Now.
I need a cigarette.
On The Road II 